dismayed

my head is spinning and i am confused. all i am feeling is dismal. i am starting to get discouraged... and demoralized.

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i do not like what is happening. the comfortable next to home, peaceful, harmonious and fun environment that i used to hear and had experienced for a few weeks no longer exists. the place is beginning to feel odd and suffocating like a place no one would like to stay even for a minute. i am beginning to feel discomfort. it's like walking on a thin glass that will break anytime you take a wrong step. i am trying hard to shake it off but until when? i guess until the day comes that i have to leave because they forced me to.

lord, please grant me the strength i need to surpass all of these. i cannot fail this time. i should not fail. amen.